so long. farewell.

As I sit here and write this there are, approximately, 9 hours left in 2009. This year has been one of the best, and worst of my life. Best in the sense that I made new friends and got to move back to within 5 miles of my family, but worst in that there were so many nights spent crying myself to sleep over the fact that I was almost 600 miles away from the family I loved. That loneliness hit me really hard this year and I'm guess I glad it did because that prompted me to begin my search for a job in Mississippi so that I could be 5 miles from my family. I decided to do a little picture flashback of my year, really only sharing the good times (because, really, who takes pictures of sad times???).

2009 is almost behind us and 2010 (we'll see how long it takes me to remember to write 2010 on my checks instead of 2009) is bearing down on us. Last night at church Romans 12:12 was brought to my attention. Now, I'm sure I've read it before, but it really just stuck with me. I've decided to make that my 'theme verse' for the year.

"rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer;"
- Romans 12:12

I pray that 2010 is full of blessings too numerous to count (I stole that phrase from my friend Chelsea) and that we grow closer to the Provider of those blessings each and every day.

New Year's Day 2009!
I finally got to see my long-lost friend, Carlin, after having not seen her for 18 months (?) in MY town! :)

Carlin and I cheering on Ole Miss in the Cotton Bowl! Our Rebs pulled it out and won!

Kelley and I @ a Journey Group game night in January. The girls won at the Battle of the Sexes Charade game ;) Kelley and Brandon are expecting their first child, a boy, in March 2010!

A really bad picture of me with the cake I baked. I look super bad. This is also about 5 minutes before my cake stand lid fell to the ground and shattered! :S

My new friend, Destiny, that I made at the church-wide garage sale. She was just about the sweetest thing and wrote me some sweet little notes after having known her for 5 minutes. She also asked me to be her friend. It was possibly the sweetest question I've ever heard :)

I went to visit sister Sarah in Arkansas in May and got to actually spend time with THE Jordan Morgan! She's upset with me in this picture because I'm stooping down so that we'd be the same height :) Then of course, Joey, the college minister, pops his head in the picture!

I got to go out to eat with Sarah and the rest of her mission team when they stopped in Dallas before they flew to Thailand the next day. I love my baby sister!

I flew to Jackson to be a hostess for Carlin's (center) baby shower in June. She doesn't even look pregnant in this picture! She and her husband, Adam, would welcome Samuel Edward, to the Milner family almost exactly a month later! (or it may have been a month exactly...regardless, he was born on July 20th!) :)

My dear friend, Margaret, (who is really like a 3rd sister) spent the summer in Malaysia doing mission work and sent me a sweet message by tagging me in this facebook picture. I love her too!

I got to babysit my 'nephew', Levi, and we had a blast. Later on that night he fell asleep against my chest while I rocked him and I thought that was one of the sweetest feelings I'd ever felt.

All three Hebert sisters are finally reunited in July 2009 when Sarah and Leah came to Dallas for the SOAR conference. That was the first time we'd all been together in 7 months!

I go home mid-July and get to see the rest of my family that I hadn't seen in 7 months! Hadley isn't too happy in this picture, but she sure is a sweet niece! :)

We had to say goodbye to PJ and Adrienne (far right) as they moved back to Georgia at the end of July. We spent their last night in Texas by 'post-it-noting' and saran-wrapping some of the youth's cars. We were trying to be Charlie's Angels in this pic but I messed it up! Congratulations to PJ and Adrienne as they just announced a couple of weeks ago that they're expecting a baby in August of 2010!
My Texas family (Billy, Christy and Levi) and I have one last dinner at Tony's before I move back to Mississippi. I miss this family so much and they were so good to me (and still are even though 600 miles separate us). Levi seems way more interested in whatever's in his hand than he is in taking a picture! :)

I make the paper! :) I move back to Mississippi and accept a job at the Community Development Foundation starting October 5th. God was 'all up in this' move and I'm so beyond grateful.
October 2009 - I get to be an adult sponsor at D-NOW! I had the 10th grade girls at my house and God really moved in my heart and the hearts of others. Live Love! Sarah came home from school and we got a picture with one of my sweetest girls, Keely! :)

December 2009 - I have a nephew that's a TEENAGER! Scott turned 13 the day after I turned 26. He's exactly half my age for the next year! :) I love this boy like he was my own and I love him entirely too much. This picture was actually from Thanksgiving, days before his birthday, but it's all good. :)

Happy New Year! Love and blessings in 2010!

- Rebekah

christmas cry baby

So, my adorable niece, Hadley Grace, went to pay Santa a visit today.

Needless to say, she didn't enjoy it :)

Kudos to 'Gendaddy' for putting her bow in her hair! Ha!

Because the holidays can be so stressful, I thought this might make you laugh!

That's all!

it's christmas time!!!!

It's officially Christmas time!!!! Sorry I haven't blogged in two months friends...I don't have a computer at home and so I'd have to go over to the parent's house and use their computer and life has been BUSY!! So...what's new since I last blogged? Well...I've started my job at the Community Development Foundation in Tupelo and I absolutely LOVE it. I love what I do (I'm the Controller so...accounting-type things), the people I work with, the organization I work for...all of it!

Merry Christmas from everyone at CDF! :) Don't I look important?

I also have a new hairstyle!! I got it cut about a month ago and I've been told I look sassy! It was a dramatic change! But I like it :) We'll see if I keep it short long-term...not entirely sure. I'll grow it out eventually. Oh and I have bangs!!

Me and Mary Neal @ Thanksgiving

Ummm...not much else is going on. I have my very own Christmas tree!!! I bought it and put it up and decorated it all by myself!! I was extremely proud of myself. I even made the bow to put on top and my sister (and probably my Mom) would tell you I'm not the best bow-maker on the face of the earth...or in my family. They always seem to come out...warped. But, I did this one!

Sister Sarah is almost home for Christmas!!!!!! So that's all for now. I'll try to blog again before Christmas and be better at updating more than every 2 months :) Yay for Christmas!!!! I love this time of year!!!!!

oh my goodness...hedges are a beast...just like moving.

Wow...it has been a super long time since I've blogged! Mostly because I was trying to pack and move and then I've kind of been without a computer. As I told my mom, it's hard to blog when you don't have a computer! Anyway, so I've hijacked their computer for the evening so I could finally write an update! Yay for this kind of hijacking! Ha. Only this kind though. She was just standing here asking me about Farkle on Facebook. Oh man, I love my mom, but she is just absolutely crazy sometimes. She's super disappointed to find out you can't play against your friend. SO...continuing on.

Well, I made it back to Mississippi! It was quite an interesting process. I drove a 17-foot U-Haul ALL by myself! I should've taken a picture of myself in it. Or had Christy take a picture..anyway, but, I didn't. So, you'll just have to imagine it. I drove it a whole 15 miles in Dallas! And the only problem I had was 'curbing it' turning into my apartment complex. I want to take this opportunity to thank, even though they'll probably never read my blog, but still...it's the gesture that counts right? So, thank you to Rob Johnson, Steve Laughlin, Mike Laughlin, Billy Hall, Randy Vandivort and C.E. Sebastian for moving the entire contents of my apartment, minus some clothes, into the U-Haul in approximately one hour and 15 minutes. I mean...those guys were on the ball! It was obviously not their first rodeo. I think they did an awesome job. And then they helped me move it from the U-Haul to daddy's 18-wheeler in about...15 minutes. I just backed that thing right up to dad's truck and they just slid it on there! So that was Thursday, the 24th, and I had planned on sleeping on my air mattress until I came to Mississippi. Well, I go to air it up at about 1:30 in the morning and the batteries in the pump are DEAD! I had to sleep on the floor that night and it was MOST uncomfortable. Not cool at all!

The next day, Friday the 25th, was my last day at PwC and boy was it crazy. It was possibly the worst last day someone could have. Evidently my blackberry is defective and still has PwC's security policy on it. Believe me, I tried for about 5 hours that day to get the thing off of there, along with the help of the computer help people (who can usually fix anything in 5 minutes), but...it wasn't happening. Anyway, so, yeah, whatevs, that's old news. A huge thank you to Brandon and Kelley Bachtel for letting me sleep at their house Friday through Sunday night! My back is most appreciative because...that floor and I did not get along very well. And their guest bed is really comfortable!

So last Sunday (the 27th - my brother's 30th birthday!! woot woot!!) was my last Sunday at LHBC and it was so sad! I'm sure going to miss those people at that church. They really were my family away from home. Such special people! It was more just 'weird' to leave my friends than it was sad. I don't know how to explain it. Christy brought up a good point that it probably won't be sad until I'm sitting somewhere and I have a moment of 'Oh Christy would think that's so funny.' or 'Billy would SO say that!' :) You know what I mean?

So, I drove back to Mississippi this past Monday and my car was LOADED down...I don't know how all that stuff fit, but...I made it fit. I slept at the parents house Monday and Tuesday night because I didn't have a shower curtain in my house, then I didn't have a rod, then I didn't have a liner...so after church on Wednesday, Mom and I went to Wal-Mart and got the things I needed. Mostly just random stuff...a shower liner, a new trashcan, trashbags...a hook to hang my light on. And...other random stuff.

So, I've been unpacking (Leah did help me unpack the kitchen stuff and get it all settled in, so...thank you Leah) :) Today I tried to conquer the most physical thing I've done in a while.

Trimming the hedges.

Oh my goodness...let me just say that it's been about 3 hours since I've finished and my hands are still shaking! And I didn't have electric hedge-clippers...it was all old school. If you ever want to build up fore-arm muscle...come and trim my front hedges! Anyway, I don't know how long it had been since those hedges were trimmed because...they looked BAD. My Pawpaw used to trim them. He took pride in those shrubs. My dad fell in them jumping off the front porch one time. There's still a little hole where he fell. That was like...10 or 12 years ago...maybe longer. I included a before and after of the hedges below. The whole hedge-trimming experience got me thinking about how we let things get so bad and then it takes so much work to 'get back to normal'. Does that make any sense? Maybe it's in your quiet time or in some relationship...normal routine maintenance (i.e. reading your Bible daily = trimming the hedges every now and then) goes a LONG way to making life 'easier'. If someone had trimmed those hedges every now and then, it wouldn't have taken me about 5 hours to do what I did. Now...I'm not saying I'm perfect, because...I'm not...by any means, but it's just something to think about. I was going to go somewhere else with that but, my mind, like my hands, isn't working very well.

This is the 'before' picture that I thought to take after I'd already completed the hedge on the left...

All done! I did such a good job! Don't you think?!? ;) Mom said they were uneven. I do not care. :P

So...that's it for now. My first service back at Bethel tomorrow! So excited to be back home! And I start work Monday! I'm super excited about that too! WOOOOO!!!! I just know that I'm going to love love love my job. How many people can say that?

Not a lot I think.

I'll let you know how it goes! :)

OH.

P.S. IT'S OCTOBER!!!! That's crazy. And happy early one-year anniversary to Matt and Molly Taylor! One of the sweetest couples I've ever known! :)

one year olds, anniversaries and packing...

Well, I'm a week and a day late, but last Monday was Mr. Levi Hall's 1st Birthday!! I was so sad that I had to miss his ball-themed birthday party (I was in Mississippi for my unexpected interviews), but I DID get to see him on his actual birthday :) We celebrated with some ice cream and ball-pit playing.

Levi in his cool 'Wonder Pets' ball pit!!

The birthday boy and me! (with chocolate ice cream on his chin) :)

I'm sure going to miss this special family once I move back to Mississippi. They know how to have fun! Plus, they're the first people that I met in Dallas that were genuinely just full of niceness (is that a word?) and God's love. Inviting me over to their 'supper club' after having known me for less than 5 hours. Speaking of which...Wednesday, September 23rd is 'our' 2 year anniversary! Two years ago on that date, I walked into Lake Highlands Baptist Church and met them! And we've been together ever since! :) The Halls, albeit, only a little bit ahead of me in years, have become my 'parents', siblings, best friends, etc. while being in Dallas. I go to them with questions about what to do (they've seen a lot in their life), just to hang out, or whatever. So...happy anniversary to us!!

Christy was eating ice cream and made a funny face, so I had her re-enact it. But...it didn't really work out :)

I've been packing up for the past week and I'm ALMOST there. The main thing left is the bedroom, which means, clothes. Can I just say that I do not like folding or hanging up clothes? I'll wash clothes, fold towels, whatever, but t-shirts and jeans and shorts and that sort of stuff? I hate it. I thought the kitchen packing was bad...I may have been kidding myself. I guess we'll see if the bedroom is worse. I've also discovered that you have to have good tunes to have playing while you're packing. My fave albums that have been on repeat are Switchfoot's 'Oh! Gravity.', Coldplay's 'Viva la Vida', Carrie Underwood's 'Carnival Ride', Nichole Nordeman's 'Woven and Spun', and the 'Across the Universe' Soundtrack.

Wow, that doesn't really look like a lot...but it is. What a pain!

Wish me luck with the rest of packing! The moving of stuff happens Thursday!

gratitude...

Have you ever been so thankful for something that you can't even say anything except thank you? Your mind searches and searches for the words that can aptly describe all the thankfulness you're feeling inside and nothing really comes out of your mouth? I've experienced that in the past week and everything I was thankful for came from the most giving of givers...God.

If you've read my blog before, you might know that I'm trying to move back to Mississippi. Have been since July. I had applied for a job and was playing the waiting game. You know the one - you wake up every day thinking, 'Is it going to happen today?' 'Will I finally get the chance I've been waiting for?' Well...I had kind of 'given up' on it. I was either going to get the call for an interview or not and me freaking out about staying in Texas wasn't going to help anything.

So...there I was...sitting at work last Thursday, I had received an email from mom asking me for my resume to pass along to a guy at a local firm in Tupelo earlier that morning. All of a sudden my office phone rang. (My office phone never rings...well...not never, but hardly ever). It turns out it was a lady at the hospital wanting to know if I could come to MS for an interview! I told her of course I could and immediately called about a bajillion people. Mother first (because that's usually who I call first, she's so sweet ;) ) and on and on. Well, Mom told the accounting guy that I was going to be in town that weekend for an interview if they could move that fast, but they couldn't so...yeah, I had an interview with the hospital (the job I had been hoping for) at 2 p.m. on Friday. Well, back in Mississippi, the accounting guy (his name is Ricky, I just didn't want to confuse the story with a bunch of names), told my Mom as he was leaving that he had a friend(Matt) that was trying to fill a controller position and had been for a little while and could he (Ricky) pass my resume along to Matt. My mom said yes, of course. And that was that.

Well, as I was driving home to Mississippi, my cell phone rings. It's Matt, the friend of Ricky's. He had seen my resume and wanted me to come in for an interview! Not 5 hours before he had received my resume and wanted me to come interview for a job I had never even applied for. I was flabbergasted (that's an understatement). I KNEW that the only way this would have happened was God working. So...that interview was set for Friday at 10 a.m. The entire way home I kept thinking, this can't be really happening. I have TWO job interviews when earlier that morning I had absolutely none. I just kept saying 'Thank you Lord. Thank you Lord.' Something had to happen from at least one of these interviews. I was going to be moving back to Mississippi, I knew it! I called one of the dearest people in the world, Ms. Michelle, who was at her teenage daughter's softball game, and she just kept saying, 'You aren't serious. You can't be serious'. You're kidding me! I tried telling her, no. I couldn't believe it either, but it was really happening. I will admit that after I had spoken with Matt about the position that afternoon, I didn't think I'd be that interested, much less, qualified. But, if he felt I was worth interviewing, I wasn't going to question him.

Thursday afternoon before I left Dallas I was so nervous. Ridiculously nervous. My stomach was all aflutter and I felt like I was going to be sick. I asked friends for prayers of peace. During both interviews Friday I felt nothing but peace. Nothing but comfortable. After leaving the first interview that had gone really well, I thought...I guess I was wrong about my doubts! I really really wanted that job! I had never seen myself in that kind of job or organization before, but it sounded like something I wanted to be a part of. I can't explain it. I just wanted it. After the second interview (the interview I had hoped to have for 2 months), I left feeling...wanting. I knew that I wanted the first job, the unexpected job. But I'd have to wait to see what God said about that. Matt said he would call me Monday.

Weekend comes and goes, I drive back to Texas (by the way, longest drive yet...9 hour and 15 minutes...thanks Mississippi Bridge construction traffic...and rain from Little Rock to Dallas), and go to work Monday morning. All Monday morning I just felt like I was going to, if I'm being honest, throw up. It was judgment day. The morning drags by. It hadn't helped that I had nasty greaseball hair (I had woken up 15 minutes before I had to leave for work). It's like I was trying to will my phone to ring just by looking at it. I kept reaching for it and making sure it was on vibrate every 5 minutes. Kind of like when you're expecting a call and you call someone else and tell them to call you to make sure your phone's working? Yeah...I had it bad.

About noon, my phone starts vibrating on the audit room table. I look down and see a 662 number I don't recognize (that's the area code in MS). I picked it up...'Oh Lord please let it be Matt with my job.'

"Are you ready to move to Tupelo?"

YES!

A resounding YES! was said (in my head). The job was mine if I wanted it! And, where I had been worried about pay...God provided. More than I ever thought. I won't go into details because this post is already way too long, but let's just say I called my mom and dad as I got in my car (I had a doctor's appointment across the Metroplex), there were tears flowing down my cheeks. I was moving home. My home home. The home that I'll always miss when I'm not there. All I could say was "Thank you." It's all that would come out. Tears and 'Thank You's." When I shared the story with people (with all the details...believe it or not, this is the abbreviated version), I could only say that GOD did this. I did nothing. I deserve no credit. He deserves everything. I get to see my family every day if I want to, because HE chose to bless me that way.

Not only am I moving home, but I'm moving back into my MawMaw and PawPaw's old house. The house that I've mentioned in a previous post. The house that I absolutely love. Where I spent the summer so many years ago and came back to Texas talking like the biggest hick. Where I got to get Little Debbies out of the snack drawer. Where we got to eat sugary cereal (my fave was Lucky Charms...Mom would never buy that!). Where I would sit on the porch swing with Mawmaw and watch as lightning bugs lit up the yard. Where the lightpole in the back would scare me at night and I thought I'd be kidnapped. Where my Mawmaw told me that if I did get kidnapped...they'd bring me back as soon as they got me under a streetlamp and saw how ugly I was. (She was only kidding...but it worked.) Where I'd play with (evidently) my Aunt Becky's Lite-Brite...the best toy in the world. Where I was paid $.25 cents per plastic grocery sack of purple hull peas I would shell. Where PawPaw would stoke his burn pile of leaves and other stuff.

Where I learned about life.

Do you get that I love this house?

And now, I get to live in it.

So...I'm packing my Dallas apartment up. Just an FYI...packing up a kitchen by yourself is NO FUN. Not that packing is fun. But, it is when you're moving somewhere you love.

My last day at PwC is August 25th (a week from today). It's crazy. I've been here two years and almost a month and these people have become my friends.

I'm heading to Mississippi, with Dallas fading in the rearview mirror on September 30th.

I start my new job as Controller at the Community Development Foundation (by the way, have I told you how excited I am about it?!?!? REALLY excited!) on October 5th.

All of this said...I can only say that I'm grateful. Grateful that God chose to bless me like He has. Grateful that I'll get to serve Him with a group of people that I love to death. Grateful for so many things.

Nichole Nordeman's song 'Gratitude' has been playing in my head all week. Below are some of the lyrics that just really stick out to me...

Oh the differences that often are between...

Everything we want.

And what we really need.

We'll give thanks to You

With gratitude

For lessons learned in how to trust in You

That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream

In abundance or in need

Father, thank you for everything You are in my life. I don't deserve the love and blessings you so richly bestow on me, but yet, you give them to me, asking for nothing in return. I pray that I'll be a good steward of these blessings and that you'll allow me to bless others. I'm speechless and can only say...thank you.

low is a height...

I've recently (in the past 3 weeks) come to LOVE LOVE LOVE the television show 'Bones'. It's seriously one of the greatest tv shows I've ever watched. It's a crime-scene nerd show that's not depressing or scary like some of the other crime-scene dramas we've seen (the three Law & Orders, all the CSI's, you get the picture). Plus, it's funny! David Boreanaz plays FBI Special Agent Seeley Booth (btw, he's HOT) and Emily Deschanel plays Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan, a forensic anthropologist who assists Booth in solving crimes using her team of people that all have distinct talents. The show has a great chemistry and the cast know how to interact and make it funny, but still tell a story that keeps you interested.

Anyway, so I basically spent all of Labor Day weekend watching Season 4 (the season that just ended May 2009) and I CANNOT wait until Season 5 premieres next week!! I'm interested to see what happens. Before I started watching Season 4, I had ordered all of Season 3 on Netflix and I finished those last Thursday and there's this one song in the episode called 'The Knight on the Grid' and I've just been listening to it over and over and over again. It's such a good, 'chill' song. You know? It's called 'Low is a Height' (<--that's the video) and it's by Great Northern.

If you're like me, you have a song that once you find it, you absolutely love it, and listen to it over and over again. The song just speaks to you in a way and you just...love it! I don't really 'get' what the song means. I'm not good with things like that. I've posted the lyrics below, and while I may not get it, I could just listen to it on repeat for a long time I'm sure. It's kind of melancholy, but I don't care. I wish I could express how much I like this song, is that point coming across? I really really like it!

So...I just felt like sharing this great song that I love love love! :)

"Low Is A Height"

Drink to the sun

We write to millions

You kill everyone

Around you

Save yourself from...

From the ground you break

And the lives you take

I lock the door

Spinning the dust...

In a room

Still like the sun

around you

Don't like the space of

All our space of

And you're just become a word...

I hope everyone had a great weekend!! I really did absolutely nothing besides watch Bones. I just cleaned the kitchen and living room up so at least I did something semi-productive. I need to start packing up...blah! I hate packing, but my lease ends in 3 weeks! Wish me luck!

Go listen to the song!! :)

from blue's clues to facebook...

You may have figured out by now that I absolutely love my family to pieces. Love. Them. To. Pieces. Even though sometimes we disagree, my family is always there for me in the end.

Today started out like any other Saturday. Went to bed late. Slept in. Checked facebook...that's where it all ends. You see, I had a friend request pending. I clicked on the button and saw that it was from my nephew...Scott. At first I thought, oh goodness, he went and created a facebook account on his own. His mother and I had a discussion a couple of months ago about why Scott didn't need a facebook. He'll be 13 in 3 months. That's right...13. In fact, the day after I turn 26. Maybe that's why we're so close. He was due on my birthday but arrived about 11 hours and 34 minutes too late. (Or something like that). Anyway, so you see I had this friend request and of course I accepted it, but the entire time I was thinking, "My nephew is old enough to have a facebook." Lord help us all.

There have been a lot of things lately that have reminded me that he's not the sweetest, cutest, smartest, funniest little 3 year old that I once knew (although, everything really still stands except for the age). Just the fact that he is about to be a teenager speaks volumes...I'm used to thinking of teenagers as kids that were teenagers when I first knew them, I don't like for people to grow up. Especially when they're younger than me and make me feel old. Anyway, so there's that.

He started junior high this fall. Junior high!!! He knows about fractions and all sorts of science stuff that I don't remember. He's learning it. He has to endure that world which I hated. All I want to do is be able to be there and not let him get bullied and for everyone else to see him as I see him. Which, won't happen, but isn't that what everyone wants? For people to love the people they (we) love as much as they (we) love them? (Does that make sense?) Don't we just want a better world/school/life for them than we had? I promise I'm not his mother.

He also attended SOAR this summer. A youth conference put on by the association of which their church is a part. It's for teenagers to grow closer to God and each other. But see, he was finally able to take part in something that had been 'mine' for 13 years. I remember the first time I went to SOAR and here was my nephew doing the same thing all those years later.

All these realizations really just shake my world. Make me realize life's not the same as it once was, nor will it ever be. Even when I move back to Mississippi, things won't be the same. I'm a different person (although not that much different) but I have encountered situations and people that have changed my life in Dallas in two short years. Don't you ever wish for those days back? When you were carefree and the extent of your worries was making sure that you got a red popsicle? (They ARE the best flavor after all).

People grow up. They change. Also the way we treat them has to change. I can't treat the soon to be 13 year old Scott the same way I treated the 3 year old Scott that watched Blues Clues. That and Barney, I think were some of his favorite shows. And I'm not ashamed to say that I watched them with him. When we'd get ready in the mornings I learned about pumpernickel bread. "Yum, yum, pumpernickel, pumpernickel bread." That's how the song went. And I STILL love the mail song from Blue's Clues. When I feel like having a laugh I'll sing it. I tried finding a good video of it but failed. They were either full of kids screaming along or 'remixes' that were quite scary.

Perhaps my most favorite picture ever of my nephew is of him when he's about 2 or 3 and he has on a striped green 'Steve' shirt, khaki pants, and is holding a stuffed Blue that made noises and stuff. Most absolute favorite picture ever.

He'll grow up, go to high school (Lord please help me on his first day of freshman year), go to college (oh no), and have a job and family of his own. But I'll never ever ever forget the little kid in that picture holding that stuffed animal dancing and smiling and laughing.

I just felt like reminiscing about my funny nephew. He really is the funniest 12 year old I know. So sharp. So cute. So loving. I'll leave you with some of my other favorite pictures of him :)

Second most favorite pic of him (then 10) and my sister (his mom - I won't say how old she was) :) Christmas picture at church.

Thanksgiving 2008

Maybe Thanksgiving or so 2005?

Around Christmas 2006 with Aunt Sarah

Me and him July 2009

Bushel and a peck. ;)

grrr...argh...

Ummm...so I went and rented '17 again' (watching it now - Zac Efron is such a cutie!) and while I was at Blockbuster I decided I wanted some Milk Duds. They are sooooo good! Anyway, so I opened the box and they were all stuck together at the bottom. I tried peeling the box from the Milk Duds and it wasn't really working. So, I wielded a knife and cut the box apart. That's how much I wanted those Milk Duds! See the before and after below.

Before...After...

It didn't really leave much to eat but boy was it yum! :)

don't be such a scaredy cat...

Well...it was an interesting Saturday night/Sunday morning. And after reading this, you're probably all going to think I'm certifiably crazy, but I promise, I'm not!

I'm always tired when I get in from Albuquerque, so Friday night I went to bed 'early' (by 10:45...that's early for me on a Friday) and slept til about 10:30 Saturday morning...then read and napped, and read some more the rest of the day. So, when it came time to go to sleep Saturday night I wasn't really that tired and I watched the movie Roman Holiday. Have you ever seen it? I thought it was going to be cute but...it wasn't. And the ending is sad, what's that all about. I hate sad endings.

Anyway, so I finally got to sleep about 2:15 or so and I was excited because Sunday was 'Be the Church' Sunday at...church, and instead of having a regular worship service we were going to go help out with stuff in the community (delivering meals to nursing homes, helping fix up a little garden-type area at the school that neighbors us, touch up stuff, that sort of thing).

Well...I'm woken up at 4:45 by my home phone ringing. Mind you...this phone NEVER rings. Unless it's a telemarketer...but they don't call at 4:45 in the morning. So, I let it ring one time...the phone in my room has the ringer turned off but I could hear it in the living room just keep ringing. I roll over and grab my cell phone off the floor, freaking out thinking, what if it's Mom and she tried calling my cell phone (but I put it on silent when I sleep), and someone's been in an accident or the world is coming to an end...or something. But, no missed calls there. So, I lay there, thinking, must've been the wrong number. The phone stops ringing. 15 seconds later...it starts ringing again. This time I answer it, "Hello?" (in my 4:45, you've just woken me up voice, it wasn't pretty).

No answer.

"Hello?" They hang up. I'm kinda freaked out this time. Who keeps calling and why don't they say anything?

30 seconds later...you guessed it...my phone rings AGAIN. I answer the first time "Hello?!?" It makes a beeping noise like I'm supposed to leave a message and then nothing...I hang up.

Within 10 seconds of hanging up, I hear some knocking/moving around that sounds like it's coming from my kitchen (it shares a wall with my bedroom). Then, I really freak out. I sit up in bed, grab my cell phone from where I'd thrown it on the floor and get ready to punch 9-1-1. I sit there listening as I continue to hear noises, but can't tell what they are. I don't want to call 911 and say, "Umm...someone may be in my apartment, I don't know. Could the policeman come and make sure?" But then again, I don't want to die either! (Adding to my freak-out-ness is I've read that most rapes occur in the early morning hours...it was 5:00 a.m. by this point...you see where I'm going).

So...I do nothing. I lie there and listen to the sounds trying to decide if I'm going to have anything left in my apartment when I open my bedroom door in the morning and listening to the air conditioner turn on and then off every little bit. Vascillating between calling 911 and facing my death by burglars. I do this until 8:00 a.m. when I finally, somehow, fall back asleep.

My alarm goes off at 8:10 to get ready for church and I turn it off, wanting to get up (I get to go serve today!) but in reality, falling back asleep. I wake up just before noon. Remembering the fear of having been robbed I, tentatively, open my bedroom door...see my purse still sitting on the couch, my car keys in there little spot...nothing touched, and I think to myself..."What in the world was I thinking?"

I don't really know what it was I heard last night (perhaps the neighbors below me....they're loud and do things at odd times), but the fear of it being something huge kept me awake and eventually, from serving God.

I then realized, I do that a lot...let my fears keep me from being everything I can for God. Kind of like a modern-day Moses. Lord, I can't lead these people. Lord, I'm not a good speaker. Lord, let Aaron do this. You get it?

I'm slowly overcoming my crazy fears, but I still have a long, long way to go. In that time while I was lying there, I prayed, asking God to calm me and not let me die. (I can be dramatic sometimes). Hopefully going forward I won't be so scared and realize that I have the power of the Almighty Living God on my side.

My mom is reading this and thinking about the time that I thought someone was breaking into our house so I go upstairs and get a butcher knife to protect myself with. She finds me the next morning, butcher knife on the night stand and I'm sure...a little worried. :S

"The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"
Psalm 118:6 - NIV

Maybe I should remember that next time.

And please...really...I'm not crazy! :)

a-may-zing...

So...one of the top 'concerts' of all time --> Hillsong United.

I'm too tired to post much right now but I'll just leave you with this one picture (even though you can't really see anything but the lights).

Oh goodness, I have to be up in less than 4 hours and fly to Albuquerque. Yuck!

heck yeah!!!

I GET TO GO SEE HILLSONG UNITED TONIGHT!!!!!

CAN YOU TELL I'M EXCITED?!?!?!?

more to come...

:)

broken and beautiful

Wow, it has been an interesting 3 or 4 days since I last posted and my mind is everywhere. So many things going on and I don't even really know where to start. So, I'll just...start.

Thursday I found myself having the need to just be broken before God...and some friends. I'd discovered that for the past month or so I've been holding onto fears...

Will I keep my job? (Performance ratings were coming out).
Can I pay all my bills?
Will I find a new job?
Please don't make me work with this person again...
What if I get a flat tire?
What if I get in a car accident? (Yes seriously).

and on and on.

and on.

This holding on to fear was ruining my life!! It's not that I wasn't a happy person but this fear was strangling the life out of me and something had to be done...quick! Well Thursday it all boiled up into one big mess and the pot it was in couldn't hold it anymore. I cried and cried and cried...and cried. I had to admit to God that I was holding on so tightly to those fears (even though He already knew) and ask him to replace those fears with faith to trust in Him.

I never really thought about it before but God wants us to ask Him for faith. He wants us to trust Him because that's the best plan. Faith in Him. So I prayed, "Lord, increase my faith, help me to realize (and believe) that You're in control of every little thing in my life."

Along the same lines, I have a tendency to worry about insignificant things...so much anxiety. So along with asking God to give me faith, I asked Him for peace. Peace to help me not worry and to give every worry and anxious or nervous thought to Him. While it's only been a couple of days, I can already see that He has been granting me peace and an increased faith to fight those fears that pop up. A good verse to show us God's want for peace in our lives is John 14:27 (and one of my favorites).

I once heard confession does a soul good. While I'm not sure about the confessions of sin to a priest or other clergy member, Ezra 10:11 says "Now then make confession to the LORD, the God of your fathers, and do his will" (ESV). May we always come before God and confess to Him our sin, problems, hopes and dreams. Being broken, even though it may hurt, so that God can administer to us His perfect and amazing grace.

I also felt led by the Spirit to confess sin in my life to some friends which I had taken advantage of. How sweet the feeling of knowing that you are living and doing right by your brothers and sisters in Christ (and unbelievers for that matter). I can't explain the feeling of knowing that there is nothing separating me from their love, nor the love of God. I can't really explain it very well, but, that's my feeble attempt.

I now realize in the future with my weak-willed ways of holding on to fears, I have to confess these things to God every day.

Every hour.

Every minute...

We'll see how it goes. Please pray that I can hold fast to obeying His commandment and confess to Him these things.

On a sidenote, for those of you who like to read. I strongly recommend Spirit-Controlled Temperament by Tim LaHaye. It's a very good book that I finished in a couple of hours (although the version the link goes to is an extended edition), and it really helped me come to grips with not only what were my strengths but some of my weaknesses (like fear, worry, lack of self-control, etc.). You may want to check out your church library, maybe they have it, but it's pretty cheap on Amazon.

I hope everyone's had a blessed weekend and that the week to come is just as blessed :)

Grace, peace and NO FEAR! :)

P.S. When I was googling 'brokenness' (to see how to spell it), I found this really great little article on being broken before God. You should read it.

how sweet it is to be loved by you

I just love my mom. She's one of the hippest and coolest cats I know, and after having just been on the phone with her for 49 minutes talking about this and that, and this and that some more, I felt like I had to write about her.

I wouldn't consider her an ordinary mom. She's sacrificed more than I know or will ever know for us, all without ever complaining one single bit. I've never heard her say, 'I've done this for you, now why can't you give me something in return'. Or if I have, I've forgotten about it, and we've already established that I have an awesome memory, so I don't see that as an option. Although I've given her a hard time (see my 'Stitch in Time' post), she really has done and is doing a wonderful job of raising her 'children' (if you can call a 31, 29, 25 and 21 year old that).

For a long time I couldn't remember if her birthday was August 5th or 7th. I don't know why, it just never seemed to stick. I think this is payback for her always asking what year I was born. That never seemed to stick with her. She also doesn't seem to remember some big events from my childhood - when I stepped on a nail and gashed my foot open or when she forgot to pick me up from school one afternoon - those sorts of things. I've ragged her about it for 15 some odd years and realized today...why? Why when all she's ever shown me is love do I give her a hard time?

I can count on...maybe two fingers the times my mother has been really angry or upset with me (and at least one of those was deserved - can we say 'You can't ride with us to the Singing Christmas Tree (except in a way cruel-er) way?). Two times...in almost 26 years. Isn't that amazing? Now, maybe she's been upset with me more than those times but I don't think she ever let it show.

I say all this now because I realize some people aren't blessed with moms that are as loving or caring. They don't have moms that drove to and from Dallas in 36 hours to find an apartment with you, or called you every day (multiple times a day) when you were in a new place all by yourself, or sent you a Halloween card just to send you something, or gave you a Christmas tree as flowers on your birthday so that you could have a tree in your apartment, or look for houses for you when you can't even buy a house, or get you a subscription to the Itawamba County Times because they know it makes you happy, or simply pray for you when they know their little girl needs it. I can't explain the number of times she's been there for me in little ways and big and whether she realizes how other people compliment the job she did raising us children.

I'm not very eloquent and really don't have a way with words, even though I'd like to, but I just had to give credit where credit is due. My mother is the epitome of a Proverbs 31 woman. One of the best moms I know.

Favorite picture of us - Thanksgiving or Christmas 2006

On our way to apt. search in Dallas - we made her cry because she took her shoes off and they smelled so bad - August 2007

Making sure the window in my bathroom opens...it didn't. However, I eventually got it open like a year and half later.

Giving Leah rabbit ears. Ha, Leah wasn't happy - Christmas 2007

Modeling a vest (that we made her put on) in the thrift store - September 2008

One of our favorite pasttimes - playing Phase 10 - Thanksgiving 2008

I realize she's reading this and my guess is - crying - but I had to get it out. Sorry for making you cry Mama, but just think of me singing "Ask any of the chickies in my pen. They'll tell you I'm the biggest Mother...Hen." and smile :)

I love you!

disappearing act

Have you ever wanted to disappear? Just drop all your responsibilities and obligations and run off into the sunset never to be seen or heard from again? One of my friends posted this interesting link on Facebook last night and I found it uber-intriguing. It's a Wired magazine article on what it takes for a person's identity to disappear.

Well, the author of the article, Evan Ratliff, has pulled a little vanishing act of his own (all planned of course). It's basically a real-life 'Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?". He 'disappeared' from San Francisco on August 15th and is trying to 'stay hidden' for 30 days without being found. I guess he's doing it to see if it can actually be done.

The winner of the contest gets $5,000. All you have to do to win is get a picture of him and say the code word 'fluke'. (If you read the article, you'll understand the code word).

Can he really do it? While I'm not searching for him, I find the whole prospect very interesting. It's kind of like a whodunnit, but...not really. Plus, with $5,000 up for grabs, that could change someone's day in a real big way.

Here are some links to websites/FB groups/blogs what have you. Check out the original article and maybe join in on the search!

Original Wired Article

Wired updates

FB group - The Search for Evan Ratliff

Blog of a Searcher - Jeremiah

Another Blog

Various Twitter Feeds -

http://twitter.com/VanishingAct01

http://twitter.com/nxthompson

http://twitter.com/FindEvanRatliff

http://twitter.com/EvansVanished

After having read the article, I realized there is no way I could ever pull one off. I'd miss my family way way way too much, plus living a solitary life with no connection to the past would just be too hard.

Peace, love and happy hunting! :)

back among the living

I have mono. And mono sucks. And for 8 of the last 10 work days, I've been home sick. Sunday was my first day back to church in two weeks and boy did it feel nice. Not only did Christy make an awesome banana cake for Billy's birthday, but we also went out to lunch afterwards to celebrate.

Me, Christy, Levi and Billy on his 31st! :)

I'm so glad that I was able to get out of the house because I was about to go stir crazy! Not only that, but to be able to celebrate a fun time with friends that have basically become my family in Dallas is also a blessing.

Later that night we went to Campisi's for some pizza with some other friends and I had to get a picture with little Mr. Levi.

I swear he was looking before it flashed! :)

God has truly blessed me with some great friends here in Dallas and I'll be so sad to leave them when the time comes to move back to Mississippi. They miss you when you're not at church, they call and make sure you're okay, they help you out when you're in a bind and they share in the building of memories that I'll hold in my heart forever.

Just an update on the job search, I'm still in the running for the accountant position I've applied for at the largest rural medical center in the U.S. Please keep praying that God's will be done in this area of my life!

Peace, love and friendship! :)