grrr...argh...

Ummm...so I went and rented '17 again' (watching it now - Zac Efron is such a cutie!) and while I was at Blockbuster I decided I wanted some Milk Duds. They are sooooo good! Anyway, so I opened the box and they were all stuck together at the bottom. I tried peeling the box from the Milk Duds and it wasn't really working. So, I wielded a knife and cut the box apart. That's how much I wanted those Milk Duds! See the before and after below.

Before...After...

It didn't really leave much to eat but boy was it yum! :)

don't be such a scaredy cat...

Well...it was an interesting Saturday night/Sunday morning. And after reading this, you're probably all going to think I'm certifiably crazy, but I promise, I'm not!

I'm always tired when I get in from Albuquerque, so Friday night I went to bed 'early' (by 10:45...that's early for me on a Friday) and slept til about 10:30 Saturday morning...then read and napped, and read some more the rest of the day. So, when it came time to go to sleep Saturday night I wasn't really that tired and I watched the movie Roman Holiday. Have you ever seen it? I thought it was going to be cute but...it wasn't. And the ending is sad, what's that all about. I hate sad endings.

Anyway, so I finally got to sleep about 2:15 or so and I was excited because Sunday was 'Be the Church' Sunday at...church, and instead of having a regular worship service we were going to go help out with stuff in the community (delivering meals to nursing homes, helping fix up a little garden-type area at the school that neighbors us, touch up stuff, that sort of thing).

Well...I'm woken up at 4:45 by my home phone ringing. Mind you...this phone NEVER rings. Unless it's a telemarketer...but they don't call at 4:45 in the morning. So, I let it ring one time...the phone in my room has the ringer turned off but I could hear it in the living room just keep ringing. I roll over and grab my cell phone off the floor, freaking out thinking, what if it's Mom and she tried calling my cell phone (but I put it on silent when I sleep), and someone's been in an accident or the world is coming to an end...or something. But, no missed calls there. So, I lay there, thinking, must've been the wrong number. The phone stops ringing. 15 seconds later...it starts ringing again. This time I answer it, "Hello?" (in my 4:45, you've just woken me up voice, it wasn't pretty).

No answer.

"Hello?" They hang up. I'm kinda freaked out this time. Who keeps calling and why don't they say anything?

30 seconds later...you guessed it...my phone rings AGAIN. I answer the first time "Hello?!?" It makes a beeping noise like I'm supposed to leave a message and then nothing...I hang up.

Within 10 seconds of hanging up, I hear some knocking/moving around that sounds like it's coming from my kitchen (it shares a wall with my bedroom). Then, I really freak out. I sit up in bed, grab my cell phone from where I'd thrown it on the floor and get ready to punch 9-1-1. I sit there listening as I continue to hear noises, but can't tell what they are. I don't want to call 911 and say, "Umm...someone may be in my apartment, I don't know. Could the policeman come and make sure?" But then again, I don't want to die either! (Adding to my freak-out-ness is I've read that most rapes occur in the early morning hours...it was 5:00 a.m. by this point...you see where I'm going).

So...I do nothing. I lie there and listen to the sounds trying to decide if I'm going to have anything left in my apartment when I open my bedroom door in the morning and listening to the air conditioner turn on and then off every little bit. Vascillating between calling 911 and facing my death by burglars. I do this until 8:00 a.m. when I finally, somehow, fall back asleep.

My alarm goes off at 8:10 to get ready for church and I turn it off, wanting to get up (I get to go serve today!) but in reality, falling back asleep. I wake up just before noon. Remembering the fear of having been robbed I, tentatively, open my bedroom door...see my purse still sitting on the couch, my car keys in there little spot...nothing touched, and I think to myself..."What in the world was I thinking?"

I don't really know what it was I heard last night (perhaps the neighbors below me....they're loud and do things at odd times), but the fear of it being something huge kept me awake and eventually, from serving God.

I then realized, I do that a lot...let my fears keep me from being everything I can for God. Kind of like a modern-day Moses. Lord, I can't lead these people. Lord, I'm not a good speaker. Lord, let Aaron do this. You get it?

I'm slowly overcoming my crazy fears, but I still have a long, long way to go. In that time while I was lying there, I prayed, asking God to calm me and not let me die. (I can be dramatic sometimes). Hopefully going forward I won't be so scared and realize that I have the power of the Almighty Living God on my side.

My mom is reading this and thinking about the time that I thought someone was breaking into our house so I go upstairs and get a butcher knife to protect myself with. She finds me the next morning, butcher knife on the night stand and I'm sure...a little worried. :S

"The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"
Psalm 118:6 - NIV

Maybe I should remember that next time.

And please...really...I'm not crazy! :)

a-may-zing...

So...one of the top 'concerts' of all time --> Hillsong United.

I'm too tired to post much right now but I'll just leave you with this one picture (even though you can't really see anything but the lights).

Oh goodness, I have to be up in less than 4 hours and fly to Albuquerque. Yuck!

heck yeah!!!

I GET TO GO SEE HILLSONG UNITED TONIGHT!!!!!

CAN YOU TELL I'M EXCITED?!?!?!?

more to come...

:)

broken and beautiful

Wow, it has been an interesting 3 or 4 days since I last posted and my mind is everywhere. So many things going on and I don't even really know where to start. So, I'll just...start.

Thursday I found myself having the need to just be broken before God...and some friends. I'd discovered that for the past month or so I've been holding onto fears...

Will I keep my job? (Performance ratings were coming out).
Can I pay all my bills?
Will I find a new job?
Please don't make me work with this person again...
What if I get a flat tire?
What if I get in a car accident? (Yes seriously).

and on and on.

and on.

This holding on to fear was ruining my life!! It's not that I wasn't a happy person but this fear was strangling the life out of me and something had to be done...quick! Well Thursday it all boiled up into one big mess and the pot it was in couldn't hold it anymore. I cried and cried and cried...and cried. I had to admit to God that I was holding on so tightly to those fears (even though He already knew) and ask him to replace those fears with faith to trust in Him.

I never really thought about it before but God wants us to ask Him for faith. He wants us to trust Him because that's the best plan. Faith in Him. So I prayed, "Lord, increase my faith, help me to realize (and believe) that You're in control of every little thing in my life."

Along the same lines, I have a tendency to worry about insignificant things...so much anxiety. So along with asking God to give me faith, I asked Him for peace. Peace to help me not worry and to give every worry and anxious or nervous thought to Him. While it's only been a couple of days, I can already see that He has been granting me peace and an increased faith to fight those fears that pop up. A good verse to show us God's want for peace in our lives is John 14:27 (and one of my favorites).

I once heard confession does a soul good. While I'm not sure about the confessions of sin to a priest or other clergy member, Ezra 10:11 says "Now then make confession to the LORD, the God of your fathers, and do his will" (ESV). May we always come before God and confess to Him our sin, problems, hopes and dreams. Being broken, even though it may hurt, so that God can administer to us His perfect and amazing grace.

I also felt led by the Spirit to confess sin in my life to some friends which I had taken advantage of. How sweet the feeling of knowing that you are living and doing right by your brothers and sisters in Christ (and unbelievers for that matter). I can't explain the feeling of knowing that there is nothing separating me from their love, nor the love of God. I can't really explain it very well, but, that's my feeble attempt.

I now realize in the future with my weak-willed ways of holding on to fears, I have to confess these things to God every day.

Every hour.

Every minute...

We'll see how it goes. Please pray that I can hold fast to obeying His commandment and confess to Him these things.

On a sidenote, for those of you who like to read. I strongly recommend Spirit-Controlled Temperament by Tim LaHaye. It's a very good book that I finished in a couple of hours (although the version the link goes to is an extended edition), and it really helped me come to grips with not only what were my strengths but some of my weaknesses (like fear, worry, lack of self-control, etc.). You may want to check out your church library, maybe they have it, but it's pretty cheap on Amazon.

I hope everyone's had a blessed weekend and that the week to come is just as blessed :)

Grace, peace and NO FEAR! :)

P.S. When I was googling 'brokenness' (to see how to spell it), I found this really great little article on being broken before God. You should read it.

how sweet it is to be loved by you

I just love my mom. She's one of the hippest and coolest cats I know, and after having just been on the phone with her for 49 minutes talking about this and that, and this and that some more, I felt like I had to write about her.

I wouldn't consider her an ordinary mom. She's sacrificed more than I know or will ever know for us, all without ever complaining one single bit. I've never heard her say, 'I've done this for you, now why can't you give me something in return'. Or if I have, I've forgotten about it, and we've already established that I have an awesome memory, so I don't see that as an option. Although I've given her a hard time (see my 'Stitch in Time' post), she really has done and is doing a wonderful job of raising her 'children' (if you can call a 31, 29, 25 and 21 year old that).

For a long time I couldn't remember if her birthday was August 5th or 7th. I don't know why, it just never seemed to stick. I think this is payback for her always asking what year I was born. That never seemed to stick with her. She also doesn't seem to remember some big events from my childhood - when I stepped on a nail and gashed my foot open or when she forgot to pick me up from school one afternoon - those sorts of things. I've ragged her about it for 15 some odd years and realized today...why? Why when all she's ever shown me is love do I give her a hard time?

I can count on...maybe two fingers the times my mother has been really angry or upset with me (and at least one of those was deserved - can we say 'You can't ride with us to the Singing Christmas Tree (except in a way cruel-er) way?). Two times...in almost 26 years. Isn't that amazing? Now, maybe she's been upset with me more than those times but I don't think she ever let it show.

I say all this now because I realize some people aren't blessed with moms that are as loving or caring. They don't have moms that drove to and from Dallas in 36 hours to find an apartment with you, or called you every day (multiple times a day) when you were in a new place all by yourself, or sent you a Halloween card just to send you something, or gave you a Christmas tree as flowers on your birthday so that you could have a tree in your apartment, or look for houses for you when you can't even buy a house, or get you a subscription to the Itawamba County Times because they know it makes you happy, or simply pray for you when they know their little girl needs it. I can't explain the number of times she's been there for me in little ways and big and whether she realizes how other people compliment the job she did raising us children.

I'm not very eloquent and really don't have a way with words, even though I'd like to, but I just had to give credit where credit is due. My mother is the epitome of a Proverbs 31 woman. One of the best moms I know.

Favorite picture of us - Thanksgiving or Christmas 2006

On our way to apt. search in Dallas - we made her cry because she took her shoes off and they smelled so bad - August 2007

Making sure the window in my bathroom opens...it didn't. However, I eventually got it open like a year and half later.

Giving Leah rabbit ears. Ha, Leah wasn't happy - Christmas 2007

Modeling a vest (that we made her put on) in the thrift store - September 2008

One of our favorite pasttimes - playing Phase 10 - Thanksgiving 2008

I realize she's reading this and my guess is - crying - but I had to get it out. Sorry for making you cry Mama, but just think of me singing "Ask any of the chickies in my pen. They'll tell you I'm the biggest Mother...Hen." and smile :)

I love you!

disappearing act

Have you ever wanted to disappear? Just drop all your responsibilities and obligations and run off into the sunset never to be seen or heard from again? One of my friends posted this interesting link on Facebook last night and I found it uber-intriguing. It's a Wired magazine article on what it takes for a person's identity to disappear.

Well, the author of the article, Evan Ratliff, has pulled a little vanishing act of his own (all planned of course). It's basically a real-life 'Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?". He 'disappeared' from San Francisco on August 15th and is trying to 'stay hidden' for 30 days without being found. I guess he's doing it to see if it can actually be done.

The winner of the contest gets $5,000. All you have to do to win is get a picture of him and say the code word 'fluke'. (If you read the article, you'll understand the code word).

Can he really do it? While I'm not searching for him, I find the whole prospect very interesting. It's kind of like a whodunnit, but...not really. Plus, with $5,000 up for grabs, that could change someone's day in a real big way.

Here are some links to websites/FB groups/blogs what have you. Check out the original article and maybe join in on the search!

Original Wired Article

Wired updates

FB group - The Search for Evan Ratliff

Blog of a Searcher - Jeremiah

Another Blog

Various Twitter Feeds -

http://twitter.com/VanishingAct01

http://twitter.com/nxthompson

http://twitter.com/FindEvanRatliff

http://twitter.com/EvansVanished

After having read the article, I realized there is no way I could ever pull one off. I'd miss my family way way way too much, plus living a solitary life with no connection to the past would just be too hard.

Peace, love and happy hunting! :)

back among the living

I have mono. And mono sucks. And for 8 of the last 10 work days, I've been home sick. Sunday was my first day back to church in two weeks and boy did it feel nice. Not only did Christy make an awesome banana cake for Billy's birthday, but we also went out to lunch afterwards to celebrate.

Me, Christy, Levi and Billy on his 31st! :)

I'm so glad that I was able to get out of the house because I was about to go stir crazy! Not only that, but to be able to celebrate a fun time with friends that have basically become my family in Dallas is also a blessing.

Later that night we went to Campisi's for some pizza with some other friends and I had to get a picture with little Mr. Levi.

I swear he was looking before it flashed! :)

God has truly blessed me with some great friends here in Dallas and I'll be so sad to leave them when the time comes to move back to Mississippi. They miss you when you're not at church, they call and make sure you're okay, they help you out when you're in a bind and they share in the building of memories that I'll hold in my heart forever.

Just an update on the job search, I'm still in the running for the accountant position I've applied for at the largest rural medical center in the U.S. Please keep praying that God's will be done in this area of my life!

Peace, love and friendship! :)

called on the carpet

For those of you who didn't know, I don't have a TV anymore. Well, that's not entirely true. As of 5:00 a.m. Friday morning, I no longer have DishNetwork (good riddance...worst customer service. ever.), nor do I have a replacement. But, as I was enjoying one of my last nights of being able to watch Jimmy Fallon on the Late Night show (he's funny, I don't care what you say), he had guest Hugh Dancy of 'Confessions of a Shopaholic' fame.

During the interview, it was mentioned that Dancy shares Fallon's affinity for carpet samples. To give you some history, Fallon has a 'game' on his show where people compete to win a sample of carpet. I've only seen it once, it's neither here nor there. Anyway, Dancy then told the story of how one of his friends realized there was a need for a world database of the world's airport carpet patterns and how the process works. Basically the premise is...you're stuck in the airport, your flight's been delayed and you have nothing to do (because really...airports aren't that exciting), so you whip out your camera-enabled phone and snap a picture. You send an email to the airport carpet people and they upload it. I'm not sure if you get to write the description of the carpet or if the database people do, but either way, it's kind of interesting.

The website for the world database of carpets is http://www.carpetsforairports.com/. If you've nothing else to do, you should check it out. My goal is to contribute somehow. I noticed they don't have pictures for Jackson, MS or Albuquerque, NM. Two places I've been. ABQ more so than JAN, but you get the picture. Haha, get it...picture? My favorite is Atlanta's Hartsfield-Jackson Int'l Airport. It's pretty...I can somewhat appreciate it.

For your useless information for the day, apart from that mentioned above, I thought I'd share where the phrase 'called on the carpet' originated. Below is the answer from http://www.answers.com/

"This term began as 'on the carpet', which in the early 1700s referred to a cloth (carpet) covering a conference table and therefore came to mean "under consideration or discussion." In 19th-century America, however, carpet meant "floor covering," and the expression, first recorded in 1902, alluded to being called before or reprimanded by a person rich or powerful enough to have a carpet."

So there you have it folks, all the info about carpet you cared to know. The next time you're stuck in the airport with nothing to do...get to snappin'! :)

Peace, love and airport carpet! :)

We're following the leader, the leader, the...

Do you remember that song from Peter Pan? Wow, I have not watched that movie in a hundred forevers. I discovered that I could have 'followers' of my blog, so, I decided to post about how you too, for only $19.95 can follow me and my ramblings! No, I'm kidding, it's not $19.95, it's free, but wouldn't that be cool if I could charge people for reading my blog? I wonder if anyone would pay. To become a follower, simply see the 'They like me...they really like me' section over in the sidebar. I'm not sure how it works but maybe you do.

I'm glad I have vacation today and can sleep in because...it's 4:15 in the morning! Also, I won't have TV for a month and a half in about 45 minutes. What ever will I do? I think I'll actually probably blog more. So...if you do become a follower, you have SO much to look forward to! ;)

That is all.

I feel like Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada. Simon Baker was so good-looking in that movie, even if he was evil.

it's all about the benjamins...

Hooray! Somewhere between Wednesday night and Thursday afternoon, we hit 100 views of the blog!! Now, you may think that's nothing, but I personally like to celebrate the small victories. Albeit...I'd say 20 of those visits were by me, but hey...you get the excitement. When deciding to blog about 100 hits it made me think about other times that I got excited about the number 100. The only real time I can remember was 1st grade.

It was then that we got to celebrate the 100th day of school by having a day all about the number 100. Do you remember those days? I thought it was the happiest day on earth at the time, just because I didn't have to do any school work. The only thing that could rival the 100th day of school was Field Day. Oh yes...what marvelous-ness (I'm pretty sure that's not a word). Anyway, I don't remember a whole lot about that day considering it was almost 19 years ago, but I do remember it being wonderful and there were lots of activities involving 100 garbage bags, 100 pennies (wow...I got excited about a $1?), 100 inflatable balls and 100...cupcakes!!!

Have I mentioned that I love cupcakes? I thought the picture above was quite appropriate given my love for cupcakes. They're just so...delicious! I can't even explain it. I think when I get married the wedding cake will be a made up of cupcakes. Mary Neal had a monstrous cupcake for her first birthday (pictured below) and I thought it was beyond cool! Even though I only saw pictures of it. I've totally seen the pan for making that cupcake...cake, in the SkyMall magazine! Maybe I'll buy it.

yummy!!

Anyway...there's not much else to say except the number 100 is a big accomplishment for me and at this rate, maybe we'll make it to 1,000 soon! Now that I think about it...I only remember celebrating the 100th day of school in 1st grade. What's that about?

On totally unrelated notes, congratulations to my friends Chris and Dana Adams on the birth of their 3rd little (albeit unexpected) bundle of joy--a 7 lb. 8 oz, 19 inch little boy!! AND, my friends Jason and Betsy Baldwin for finding out last night that they're expecting a boy in January! Yay for babies! :)

I have to go scrounge up something for dinner now. If you think I'm funny you should pass my blog link along to your friends so they can laugh too. Oh, and please comment! I love comments. They make me happy!

Peace, love and cupcakes! :)

a stitch in time...

So, I'm not a sewing person (I typed sewer, but...it looks like....sewer...the sewage kind, so I recanted). Anyway, but I was goofing off this morning with my post below this about album names and the 2nd picture on Flickr is the picture below.

I thought, well isn't that gorgeous! (Isn't it?? I mean...really, very chic.) And the caption led me to a blog for Cherry House Quilts (see them under my favorites to the right). So I read a little bit and just thought it was uber-cool and had to share. Plus, I think a lot of women my age don't have a hobby or passion like that to call their own these days. Something hands-on that can change your life, you know? Mama used to make dresses for us kids when we were little. Well, not all the kids, just the girls, because a dress on a boy would be awkward. But I remember this one blue and white dress. Sarah wasn't born yet and Leah and I both had matching dresses and Ed had a shirt or something of some kind. I think I was so adorable in that portrait we took, even if I had a cut or something on my lip. All that being said...I wish I could sew.

My mother has been a quilter in previous years. She finished Sarah's (my sister) in I'd guess a year or so. It's a very bright pink/white background (not sure that's the appropriate word) and has flowers on it. Keep in mind, I'm pretty sure Mom just had the quilt top from a box she bought at auction and didn't piece the top by hand. Anyway, then I selected my quilt top and it was NEVER FINISHED. That's right Mom, I'm calling you out!! Get on it!! Oh, and that was like 3 or so years ago that she started for anyone thinking, "Give the lady a chance", so...she's had time.

If you're a quilter...or sewing person, visit Cherry House's blog! It has some pretty awesome quilts and, she's fun to read. Seriously...do it. The link is right over -->

By the way, I never understood that phrase, a stitch in time saves nine. What's that about?

something to do when bored

So I was really bored when I was in Albuquerque recently and I saw this post on facebook where you go to these different websites and use these random posts to come up with an album cover, record name and band name for your first band. So...the info is below along with the instructions...however, I'm not good with photo shop and trying to add the band name and album name was quite a task so I just gave up.

Also, the other reason I'm posting this, (apart from the fact that the first time I did it, I actually liked my results) is my mom told me I can't have a posting without a picture. And I wanted to post :) So...dum da da dum (imagine part of the 20th century fox movie intro thingy)...here you go!

exercise. study. love.

american demo

Instructions:

1 - Go to Wikipedia. Select “Random Article” on the left OR click here for your randomized article.
The title of the first random wikipedia article you get is the name of your band. --> American Demo

2 - Go to Quotations Page by clicking here.
The last four or five words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album. --> Exercise. Study. Love.

3 - Go to flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”or click here.
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 - Use photoshop or a similar program to put it all together.

You make me happy

I've tried for the past 4 hours to go to sleep and it has avoided me. So, I got to thinking, what makes me happy (not joyful mind you, because joy I believe, only comes from the Lord and is everlasting whereas happiness is temporal)? I like to smile. Smiling's one of my favorite things to do. Just the fact that someone else's day can be changed from you giving them a smile makes me so happy. So I decided to start a list of things that make me happy. There are a lot and these are in no certain order, just the order of which I thought of them. Also, this list is by no means exhaustive...by no means!

- smiling - a good movie - a homecooked meal - the smell in the air right before it storms - new (comfortable) shoes - new outfits - singing - music - sleeping in - rocking a baby to sleep - talking on the phone to my nieces - childlike faith - trusting people - chocolate milk - reading at the lake - fall - christmas - pretty flowers - polka dots - finding money in my pockets - a good joke - people laughing with me - seeing good in people - chocolate cake with white icing - cupcakes - pregnant friends - a good book - answered prayers - letters in the mail - a cool pillow - my sister sarah's hair (no joke...she has great hair) - making new friends - seeing old friends that you haven't seen in a long time - weddings - little baby girl clothes (seriously....SO adorable) - christmas shopping - my mawmaw and pawpaw's old house - a fresh tomato sandwich - lush green grass - good ranch dressing - someone treating you to a meal - birthday cards - a pretty ring - a well-timed email - those surveys that you fill out on facebook (okay, moreso laugh than happy, but you get it) - starbucks - my nephew's humor - my mawmaw saying she loves me a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck - someone calling me aunt bekah - wonderful friends that are always there for me - board games - playing softball - taking way too many pictures - mawmaw - dad - mom - leah - ed - melanie - sarah - scott - anna woods - hadley grace - mary neal - uncle tony - aunt becky - andrew - eli - the local church - ms. michelle - carlin - laughter - phone conversations with family and friends -

I'm baaaccckkk...

Long time no...blog! If anyone actually was reading my blog, I apologize for taking over a year to update it. My mom most definitely 'nagged' me (if asking nicely = nagging) whether I had updated my blog lately and so on and so forth. Well, one my most dear friends just had a baby and I thought, "If Carlin can do it when she's just had a baby, surely I can do it. I don't even have a baby!" So...here you go.

Not much is new with me except the fact that I've come to a decision to move back to Mississippi. Hopefully this move will happen in the next month and a half, but it's all riding on if I can find a job. The move was necessitated by my huge lack of not being able to be 600 miles away from my family and living by myself. I miss them dearly and am missing my precious nieces (Anna Woods - 3 1/2 years, Hadley Grace - 17 months and Mary Neal - 16 months) grow up!! That combined with the fact that I have one of the most loving, caring, considerate, funniest (and on and on) families in the world, well, you can see my dilemma. I'm trusting that God will work all the little details out and I cannot wait to see what He does.

I'm beyond excited at the thought that (hopefully) very soon I'll be less than 10 minutes away from most of my immediate family. I may not seem that excited but...I most definitely am. If you're the praying type, I ask that you pray for me a job. I have had one interview and my application was passed along to the accounting department who will decide whether to grant me another interview, but it's very nerve-wracking this job-searching business!

I must be off to bed. For now I'll leave you with some pics of my precious aforementioned nieces.

Anna Woods and Mary Neal :)

Ms. Hadley Grace :)

Just because I think they are adorable...

A.W. with my cousins Andrew and Eli